Communication

Here are some tips/tools that I have gathered from a variety of different resources that may give you some tips that will help with communication. I will be adding additional resources and tips soon.

Do not give your child what he/she wants before he/she asks

Parents have excellent intuition when it comes to knowing what their children want when their children don’t communicate verbally. Many parents say they just know what their children want, but they must teach a communication form that children can use with anyone. For example, if your child walks to the fridge for milk, have him/her do one of the following: take a picture of milk off the fridge and bring it to you, sign milk, point to the fridge and vocalize, or use a voice output device. It is important to constantly think about how others might understand your child.

Do not get stuck at single words

Once your child has a good repertoire of single nouns and verbs, start thinking about combining words. One of the best ways to do this is by offering choices. Teach language so you can offer the choice, “red shirt or blue shirt?” or “big train or little train?” or “long straw or short straw?” Just by adding adjectives to the choices can give your child a natural opportunity to respond with a two word, expanded response. The best part is that your are working on language expansion and basic concepts in a natural environment.
 

The 4 Stages of Communication

1) ‘Self’ stage

Children in the ‘Self’ stage will be self-absorbed, using mostly pre-intentional communication and generally avoiding eye contact and interaction. 

2) ‘Want’ stage

Once a child realizes his or her actions have an effect on other people, he/she is i the ‘Want’ stage. They may communicate basic wants or needs by pulling towards things and attempting to get others’ attention.

3) ‘Two-way’ stage

A child in the ‘Two-way’ stage will start asking for things, and may echo language they’ve heard to ask for specific things. They will shift their gaze more and might point to things they want to show the adult.

4) ‘Conversation’ stage

A child with ASD in this stage will have become an effective communicator, able to hold a simple conversation in a comfortable environment. New or stressful environments may cause the child to revert to repetitive phrases, or ignore the turn-taking normal in conversation.

How Adults and Parents Can Help Develop Communication Skills

Become a Teacher

When a child with ASD has trouble communicating, especially in the ‘Self’ stage, it is tempting to want to do everything for them – tying shoes, getting them water, etc. – however, this does not give the child a chance to prove that they can do something, Asking twice if they need help (and waiting a bit for a response) before helping them is a good idea to help develop conversation skills and give the child a chance to help themselves.

Slow Down

Caring for a child with ASD can be stressful, and during important activities (eating breakfast, getting ready to go, etc.) you may be tempted to rush your child. Slowing down and giving time for your child to recognize and process what is happening, as well as reflect on what has happened may improve situational awareness and conversation skills.

Step Back

Once a child with ASD has developed more proficient speaking skills, it can be helpful to take a step back from being your child’s advocate, and to let them speak for themselves. Let your child initiate conversations, and do not forget to give them feedback after an important interaction that might teach your child a lesson.

Create Opportunities

Remember, practice makes perfect. When you see an opportunity for your child to practice communication, step back and let them initiate that communication. When no opportunities arise, create them yourself. Give your child an opportunity to make requests and ask questions, instead of automatically filling them in. When you meet someone new, assuming your child is at least somewhat comfortable in these situations, let them make the introductions instead of you.

Encourage Requests

Make yourself useful to encourage requests. This can be done in many ways, which depend on your child’s specific needs and abilities. For example, place a favorite toy or candy on a high shelf, where they can see it, but cannot reach it. Another idea is giving the child a complex toy, and waiting for them to request your help in operating it. Encouraging your child to ask you for help will foster a healthy interaction between you and the child.

Follow Their Lead

While leading activities is sometimes necessary, letting your child take the reigns occasionally can have numerous benefits, including practicing communicating, making decisions, and planning. During activities, let your child do what they want to do, and even copy or imitate them, to coax a 2-way interaction. They may begin to imitate you in response, and you can then add whatever you wish to the exchange. This idea extends to ending an activity too. Letting your child signal when they wish to end an activity will help develop their communication skills, but if they are still working on speech, you must pay attention to the signals your child is sending (pulling away, grimacing, etc.) to understand when they wish to stop. If they have trouble finding the words, you can say them (i.e “Had enough?” or “All done?”) to facilitate speech association.

How to Help a Child with ASD Understand What is Said to Them

There are many situations in which a child with ASD will not understand what is happening or being said to them, and even if they appear to follow directions, they may just be acting based on what they’ve done before. Comprehension, understanding what is said, is a complex skill that requires a lot of time and practice to improve.

Many autistic children experience sensory overload, where stimuli that would seem normal to us is way too much for a child with ASD. This can be extremely detrimental to the learning process, and causes many subsequent issues for children that experience it. It is important to note here, though, that every child is different, and will experience the world differently. Keep in mind your child’s specific issues, and what has worked for them in the past, when reading this section.

As a parent, how can I help my child communicate?

Interaction occurs whenever you and your child do things together and respond to one another.  Every time you and your child interact, you make a connection that gets communication started.  In order to have successful interactions, your child needs to respond to others and to initiate interactions on his/her own.

Strategies to Use

Strategies to assist your child making requests include placing his favorite thing within his view but out of reach requiring him to “request” that object.  Requesting could be by gesture, pointing, sign, picture or verbal.  Offer things, like a snack, bit by bit, so the child will have to make multiple requests.

Ways to help your child tell you “no,” “enough,” “all done,” or “stop” are to offer him or her their least favorite things.  Continue an activity until your child wants to stop.  Let your child end the activity.

To help your child understand several familiar words, describe to what your child is doing while he does it. This will help him understand the meaning of words.   Your emphasis is on helping your child understand words.  Don’t pressure him or her to talk.

When playing a physical game like chase or swinging, your child can learn he or she can start the game by saying “go” after you say “ready, set…”.  Don’t chase or swing until one of you has said “ go”.

To help your child make choices, start with easy choices.  The easiest choice for your child to make is between two things that he can see:  one that he really likes and one that he really dislikes.  Hold the choices up in front of him.